Contextualizing Gender
As a church, we believe it is important for us to proudly accept and celebrate people of all gender identities and expressions. At St. John’s, we firmly believe that being transgender is not an unnatural way of being or at odds with our Christian faith.
For further reading, here is a short list of articles to help get you started in understanding the relationships between gender, race, colonization, and spirituality:
If reading is not the best way for you to learn more about gender diversity, here is a suggested watch list of movies and TV shows that provide positive representation of trans people and characters. Watch their trailers (linked below) and see what appeals to you:
- We’re Here, available on HBO Max – Family Friendly
- Disclosure, available on Netflix – Family Friendly
- Heartstopper, available on Netflix – Rated TV-14, Family Friendly
- Sort Of, available on HBO Max – Rated TV-MA, not appropriate for young children. Tells the story of a genderqueer nanny.
- POSE, available on Hulu – Rated TV-MA, not appropriate for children.
If you have reading or film suggestions (especially for different ages and demographics) that we can add to this list, please reach out to the Rev. Jered Weber-Johnson ([email protected]) or the Rev. Craig Lemming ([email protected]).
Key Terms for Gender Diversity
If you are hearing words to describe gender for the first time, it can be confusing. Below are some common words you may hear at our church or in your community. However, this list does not cover everything. For more key terms, the glossary on the UC Davis LGBTQIA+ Resource Center website is a great place to look.
The terms and definitions below are always evolving and changing, and often mean different things to different people, but they can be a good starting point for discussion and understanding:
- Cisgender: a gender identity, or performance in a gender role, that society deems to match the person’s assigned sex at birth. The prefix cis- means “on this side of” or “not across.” A term used to highlight the privilege of people who are not transgender.
- Cissexism: The pervasive system of discrimination and exclusion founded on the belief that there are, and should be, only two genders and that one’s gender or most aspects of it, are inevitably tied to assigned sex. This system oppresses people whose gender and/or gender expression falls outside of cis-normative constructs. Within cissexism, cisgender people are the dominant group and trans/gender non-conforming people are the oppressed group.
- Gender: A social construct used to classify a person as a man, woman, or some other identity. Fundamentally different from the sex one is assigned at birth.
- Gender Dysphoria: Gender dysphoria is a term that describes a sense of unease that a person may have because of a mismatch between their biological sex and their gender identity. This sense of unease or dissatisfaction may be so intense it can lead to depression and anxiety and have a harmful impact on daily life.
- Gender Expansive: An umbrella term used for individuals who broaden their own culture’s commonly held definitions of gender, including expectations for its expression, identities, roles, and/or other perceived gender norms. Gender expansive individuals include those who identify as transgender, as well as anyone else whose gender in some way is seen to be broadening the surrounding society’s notion of gender.
- Gender Expression: How one expresses oneself, in terms of dress and/or behaviors. Society, and people that make up society characterize these expressions as “masculine,” “feminine,” or “androgynous.” Individuals may embody their gender in a multitude of ways and have terms beyond these to name their gender expression(s).
- Gender Identity: A sense of one’s self as trans, genderqueer, woman, man, or some other identity, which may or may not correspond with the sex and gender one is assigned at birth.
- Gender Queer: A person whose gender identity and/or gender expression falls outside of the dominant societal norm for their assigned sex, is beyond genders, or is some combination of them.
- Neopronouns: Neopronouns are a category of new (neo) pronouns that are increasingly used in place of “she,” “he,” or “they” when referring to a person. Some examples include: ze/zir/zirs, xe/xem/xyr, ze/hir/hirs, and ey/em/eir.
- Non binary/Nonbinary/Non-binary: A gender identity and experience that embraces a full universe of expressions and ways of being that resonate for an individual, moving beyond the male/female gender binary. It may be an active resistance to binary gender expectations and/or an intentional creation of new unbounded ideas of self within the world. For some people who identify as non binary there may be overlap with other concepts and identities like gender expansive and gender non-conforming.
- Pronouns: Linguistic tools used to refer to someone in the third person. Examples are they/them/theirs, ze/hir/hirs, she/her/hers, he/him/his. In English and some other languages, pronouns have been tied to gender and are a common site of misgendering (attributing a gender to someone that is incorrect.)
- Sex: a medically constructed categorization. Sex is often assigned based on the appearance of the genitalia, either in ultrasound or at birth.
- Transgender: An adjective used most often as an umbrella term and frequently abbreviated to “trans.” Identifying as transgender, or trans, means that one’s internal knowledge of gender is different from conventional or cultural expectations based on the sex that person was assigned at birth. While transgender may refer to a woman who was assigned male at birth or a man who was assigned female at birth, transgender is an umbrella term that can also describe someone who identifies as a gender other than woman or man, such as non binary, genderqueer, genderfluid, no gender or multiple genders, or some other gender identity.
Key Terms When Discussing Sexuality, Attraction, and Orientation
Below are some common words you may hear at our church or in your community. However, this list does not cover everything. For more key terms, the glossary on the UC Davis LGBTQIA+ Resource Center website is a great place to look.
The terms and definitions below are always evolving and changing, and often mean different things to different people, but they can be a good starting point for discussion and understanding:
- Aromantic: A romantic orientation generally characterized by not feeling romantic attraction or a desire for romance. Aromantic people can be satisfied by friendship and other non-romantic relationships. Many aromantic people also identify with a sexual orientation, such as asexual, bisexual, etc.
- Asexual: A broad spectrum of sexual orientations generally characterized by feeling varying degrees of sexual attraction or a desires for partnered sexuality. Asexuality is distinct from celibacy, which is the deliberate abstention from sexual activity, despite sexual desire. Some asexual people do have sex and do experience varying levels of sexual attraction. There are many diverse ways of being asexual. A person who does not experience sexual attraction can experience other forms of attraction such as romantic attraction, as physical attraction and emotional attraction are separate aspects of a person’s identity. These may or may not correlate with each other – for instance, some people are physically and romantically attracted to women. However, others might be physically attracted to all genders and only emotionally attracted to men.
- Bisexual: A person whose primary sexual and affectional orientation is toward people of the same and other genders, or towards people regardless of their gender. Some people may use bisexual and pansexual interchangeably.
- Cisheterosexism: Cisheterosexism is the societal and institutional privileging of heterosexuality, cisgender identity, and binary sex assignment as the norm.
- Coming Out: Coming out is the process of voluntarily sharing one’s sexual orientation and/or gender identity with others. This process is unique for each individual and there is no right or wrong way to come out. “Being out” means not concealing one’s sexual orientation or gender identity. “Outing,” is a term used for making public the sexual orientation or gender identity of another who would prefer to keep this information secret.
- Gay: Usually, a man whose primary sexual and affectional orientation is toward people of the same gender. Gay can also be used as an umbrella term for anyone that identifies as LGBTQ+. Some nonbinary people identify as gay, often because they have some connection to manhood and/or are primarily attracted to men. (See nonbinary on the other tab).
- Heteronormativity: Attitudes and behaviors that incorrectly assume gender is binary, ignoring genders besides women and men, and that people should and will align with conventional expectations of society for gender identity, gender expression, and sexual and romantic attraction. For example, someone assigned female at birth is expected to 1) have a body that is considered “female” by the dominant culture, 2) identify as a girl or woman, 3) act feminine and fulfill the roles associated with girls and/or women, and 4) be romantically and sexually attracted to men.
- Heterosexism: The assumption that all people are or should be heterosexual. Heterosexism excludes the needs, concerns, and life experiences of lesbian, gay, bisexual and queer people while it gives advantages to heterosexual people. It is often a subtle form of oppression, which reinforces realities of silence and erasure.
- Lesbian: Usually, a woman whose primary sexual and affectional orientation is toward people of the same gender. However, some nonbinary people also identify as lesbians, often because they have some connection to womanhood and are primarily attracted to women. (See nonbinary on the other tab).
- Polyamory: Denotes consensually being in/open to multiple loving relationships at the same time. Some polyamorists (polyamorous people) consider “polyam” to be a relationship orientation. Sometimes used as an umbrella term for all forms of ethical, consensual, and loving non-monogamy.
- Orientation: Orientation is one’s attraction or non-attraction to other people. An individual’s orientation can be fluid and people use a variety of labels to describe their orientation. Some, but not all, types of attraction or orientation include: romantic, sexual, sensual, aesthetic, intellectual and platonic.
- Pansexual, Omnisexual: Terms used to describe people who have romantic, sexual or affectional desire for people of all genders and sexes. Has some overlap with bisexuality and polysexuality (not to be confused with polyamory).
- Queer: Historically, queer has been used as an epithet/slur against people whose gender, gender expression and/or sexuality do not conform to dominant expectations. Some people have reclaimed the word queer and self identify in opposition to assimilation (adapted from “Queering the Field”). For some, this reclamation is a celebration of not fitting into social norms. Not all people who identify as LGBTQIA use “queer” to describe themselves. The term is often considered hateful when used by those who do not identify as LGBTQIA.
